It's an overused phrase, and perhaps all too simplistic, but the clock is ticking, at a faster pace, every hour it seems. Does this matter? Perhaps not to many of you, but I love life so much, every breath of it, and I hate seeing it slip so unstoppably fast through my fingers. The joy I feel waking up every morning, looking over at my husband, Joe, as we sip coffee in our living room, is achingly powerful. How blessed I feel, each and every day. Our nearly 37 years together have flown by. Of course we have had our struggles; our egos have put up a go[...]
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Circle of Family and Friends – You and Your Personal Community
4 Early in my 12 step recovery a sponsor assured me that it wasn't an accident that I "landed" in AA. She firmly believed that there are no accidents, no coincidences either, on our way to wherever we show up. Even though I doubted her at that time, I didn't argue. I knew that there wasn't much I understood about the way my life was unfolding. I also knew that if I stayed close to her, I'd be safe. I wouldn't drink. Nor would I get into a relationship too soon. She had "her rules." And I promised to follow them. That all seems so long ago. Anoth[...]
I have spent long hours thinking about and then treasuring all the encounters I have had in my nearly 75 years of living. In my youth, it never dawned on me, of course, that the people I met "had been sent;" had been part of the divine journey that was mine and only mine. Even as a young adult I didn't understand why my life was unfolding as it did. Now that I know the "back story" as a result of reading the books of Caroline Myss, I have had reasons, many of them, to revisit my past. Reviewing the myriad memories, focusing specifically on those experienc[...]
Circle of Family and Friends - You and Your Personal Community, Reflections in the Mirror - You and Yourself
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One’s path is divine. . .
I wouldn't have agreed with this idea prior to recovery. I wasn't "a believer." Random acts ruled, as far as I was concerned. I don't remember any more when I began to shift my perspective. Perhaps I had grown ready for the change in thinking when I came into Al-Anon in 1974. At least the talk about a Higher Power didn't scare me away. I'm guessing I was simply so tired of searching for security that what was offered in this new spiritual concept seemed pretty good. At least it didn't scare me off. And now I can't imagine trying to live my life with[...]
At the present time I have a very good friend and sponsee from the north visiting. She is dear to my heart and has been for all 25 years of her recovery. I met her at her first AA meeting, in fact, so have been able to observe her throughout her long sobriety. The past four or five years of her recovery have been tough ones, unfortunately. The thought of drinking hasn't been the problem, but obsessive anxiety has her by the tail. It has taken the joyful person I had known for twenty of these 25 years away. And I know she isn't the only person who suffe[...]
Over the years I have received hundreds, actually thousands of comments about the various blog posts I have written. It's my guess that you don't really think that your comment is any thing very special, but I want to assure you that the opposite is true. So very true. Knowing that we have made a connection is the encouragement I need to keep reaching out to you. It's also the very act that adds a bit more healing on this very pain-torn planet. As we reach out to each other we are joining hands around the globe, making the circle sacred that touches eac[...]
Are you content, right here, right now? If you aren't, (and I surely don't claim to be content every moment, ) then you have some work to do. It's our responsibility, and only our responsibility, to reach a place of contentment moment by moment. When we put the burden on others to make us content, we chance driving them away. And if they aren't driven away, at the very least they will begin to resent us. And rightly so. We don't want the burden of making others happy on our shoulders, so we shouldn't put it on the shoulders of others to make us happy[...]
I am often the only person in a collection of friends who is genuinely happy that Christmas is heading toward us, at full-speed. I have loved every aspect of the holidays since childhood. Is it because I grew up in a healthy, happy family? Not really. But we did seem to rise above the tension, the chaos and cutting criticism for most of the month of December. Mom made candy, lots of it, which my dad loved. And together we all put up the tree. The tree trimming night we got to eat the first of the fudge she had made. The house smelled good and the l[...]
I began the practice of “stepping aside” only after years of stepping into business that was clearly not my own. I had mistakenly assumed that helping others make their decisions was an important “calling.” It showed them I cared. It was my way of remaining important to them. Or so I thought. From childhood on I had virtually always felt on the edge of abandonment. By girlfriends. By boyfriends. By husbands. Thus I felt the constant pull to live “in the middle” of everyone else’s life. That way they couldn’t forget about me. [...]
Circle of Family and Friends - You and Your Personal Community, Reflections in the Mirror - You and Yourself
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Having the willingness. . .
Nothing changes in our lives unless we have the willingness to make another choice about how we see a situation or a person whom we have encountered. Perspective it's called. And that makes all the difference regarding what kind of day we will experience. The good news is that we have the ability to change our perspective at will. That's where the willingness comes in. If you aren't comfortable with a person or in a particular situation, seek to see them differently. Then wait. A shift will happen. Some refer to that shift as a miracle. I certai[...]