I've made reference to this idea in other blogs, certainly in talks I have given over the years, and in simple, very ordinary conversations with friends. It's an idea that isn't original with me. I'm not even sure it was original with Earnie Larson, but he's the man I heard say it ever so many decades ago. At the time he said it, I had no idea how relevant the idea was becoming to my life as I slowly changed; changes that were the result of working a twelve step program, a program that changed absolutely every thing in my life; and continues to influence[...]
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Karen’s Musings
0 Getting Unstuck is the title of one of my newest books. It's a book that called to me. Actually, I'd have to say that every book I have written, all 27 of them, called to me; but this one felt like the icing on the cake of how to live more peacefully in our relationships. That's my primary goal in life now. I want to treat others always in a kind, gentle way because that's how I want to be treated too. We do need to show up in the lives of others in a way that would please God. That's an easy recipe for peaceful living. My primary goals in Getting Uns[...]
I turned 74 last week. Yikes!! I have been sober exactly half my age. And I can't begin to account for all that has happened on my journey of 74 years. I can assure you much of it wasn't according to my plan! And how lucky I am that my plan was thwarted by God more than 37 years ago. I'd not be alive to write this blog if I had had my way. As a matter of fact, God tried to get my attention hundreds of times. I was just not willing to listen. And then the miracle began. It happened for me like for so many others. The presence of someone else on[...]
To react or not, that’s the choice when someone is getting under our skin. Angrily or disgustedly reacting rather than making a conscious choice to act when in the company of a person who is either getting under our skin, dismissing us all together, or being rude or mean-spirited is the default position of many. There are myriad ways to act, to respond to any situation, however. My years in Al-Anon have given me a handbook of good choices, in fact. Anger, for instance, is never one of the better ones, even when some one attacks us verbally. If the attac[...]
Detachment is stepping back from an experience in order to allow room for God to do his part. I seldom remember, without some prodding that I initially resist, that God is a factor in every person’s experience. My ego’s first inclination is to think I am a necessary factor. And not just an ordinary one but the deciding one. Giving up control and letting God be the key influence in the lives of my loved ones is not easy. It takes trust. Not only trust in God but trust in others and in my own willingness to approach my experiences with all[...]
There are no doubt many answers to this question, but I know my moodiness is generally due to one of two things: I am either tired or I am afraid about something. Both reasons are easily addressed I think. Being tired requires getting more rest. The solution is obvious. Being afraid is a bit more complex. But being a student of ACIM offers me an answer. If I am afraid, I have squeezed love out. I have turned my life, for the moment, over to the ego. The important question is "Why?" I have said many times in many workshops and many books too that[...]
Taking that ever important moment to "step aside," can make a huge difference in how we perceive the people and the circumstances that surround us. Over none of them do we have control. But we do have full control over how we perceive every person and every situation. And that's a lot of power. Power that we are both privileged to have and expected to use. Pausing before formulating a decision regarding how to act in any circumstance rewards us with a quieting mind. For some of us a quiet mind is scarce. I have discovered, however, that the more I p[...]
At a recent meeting a woman suggested the above question as a topic for discussion. Not once in 37 years had I heard this suggestion as a topic. I was immediately intrigued. Actually, it stopped me in my tracks because it dawned on me that I had not been thinking about the steps, not a single one of them, in a very focused way. And yet, their constant value in my life can't be overstated. After pausing for a moment, I acknowledged that without them, without every one of them, I might not even be here to reap the benefits of this very rich life. No s[...]
To be at peace is my goal. It's my intention. I've even decided to adopt it as my mission statement. I WANT TO LIVE AN INTENTIONALLY PEACEFUL LIFE WHICH REQUIRES THAT I OFFER THE HAND OF PEACE TO MY FELLOW TRAVELERS. I was with some women at lunch today and the idea of a mission statement for ourselves came up. Each of us felt a kinship with the idea. Living haphazardly, as many of us did in the past, is no longer appealing. Maturation makes the difference, I think. But so does the decision to live more selflessly count. Getting up every morning[...]
I've thought a lot about change this winter. I know it's because I have experienced many changes and not always gracefully. I didn't kick and holler but, at an emotional level, I resisted the inevitable. What I'm trying to say here is that I find it hard to practice what "I preach." I have been talking about change in books and workshops for decades. And I have said, probably ten thousand times, that no door closes without another door opening. I have also said we have been fully prepared for every change that occurs. And no change, absolutely no ch[...]