I celebrated my 35 year anniversary in AA three days ago. I honestly can't fathom where all the years have gone. Nearly half of my life has been spent in AA rooms. I remember quite well the first meeting I attended here in Minneapolis. I still recall many of the people, and more than a few remain in my life even today. I will get my "official" medallion tomorrow at my home group. My husband has agreed to give it to me and that's very special. We have been making this journey for many years together. There will be a bitter sweet quality about tom[...]
8 I have referenced This is Water in two earlier posts and now I want to reveal the end of David Lawrence Foster's story. He hung himself in 2008. He had suffered from severe and chronic depression his whole life and gave up when the medication no longer kept it at bay. He was in his early forties. His parents shared that his life had been a roller coaster of depression since childhood. The wonderful thing for all of us is that we have many terrific books to remember him by. (see amazon.com) His way of looking at the world resonated with me. What's ob[...]
I mentioned in the last post a great little book, This is Water, by David Foster Wallace. I endorse this book wholeheartedly, in fact. I'm personally convinced that most of us don't see the world in all it's splendor. We are like the fish just swimming along quite mindlessly. When looking around, whether in the company of friends or strangers, we are consumed with the "drivel" in our minds. I have to remind myself that whom ever is before me is my "gift" to be opened, now. I don't say this as a way to guilt you and me. Being "self-absorbed" is simply[...]
Circle of Family and Friends - You and Your Personal Community, What I Believe - You and Your Higher Power, Your Experience, Strength and Hope
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Awareness is the key to living full lives. . .
I read a wonderful little book yesterday by David Foster Wallace. The title is This Is Water. It's one of those special little books that takes a hold of you and doesn't let go. It's actually a commencement address that Mr. Wallace gave at Kenyon College in 2005. He begins with a simple story about two young fish swimming along and an older fish swims by and says, "Hello. How's the water?" After swimming on a bit, one fish looks at the other and says, "What's water?" The message, of course, is that we don't actually see what's all around us. We liv[...]
I think many of us develop our faith as a result of hind-sight coupled with the practice of prayer and meditation. I certainly didn't "come by my faith" naturally. I didn't grow up in a family where it was openly practiced or even discussed. At family gatherings my uncle said grace before eating but he was chosen only because he occasionally sobered up by reading the bible. No one went to church on a regular basis. No one. I was in a church youth group in high school but I was the sole representative for our family at Sunday services. Fear absolutel[...]
What a relief to be reminded by good friends, (and it takes a good, and brave friend to do it,) that we need not overreact to the common, ordinary situations that occur on a daily basis. As a matter of course, reacting, rather than making a calm choice to simply act, would describe many of us. And the situation that inspires the reaction is most often not even worth taking note of, let alone reacting to. Being too serious or over-reactive is often the result of being so self-absorbed that it results in having a very limited perspective on life. Me, me, m[...]
Choosing to see, and feel peace in the midst of the chaos that's so common in our lives is a decision that will change every minute of every experience from this day forward. Perhaps this seems like a stretch of the imagination that one could live this way. And I won't pretend that it's an easy choice initially, but it is doable and it does become almost second nature with consistent practice. I highly recommend it, in fact. My life has changed immeasurably since making a commitment to the practice of seeing peace rather than the distractions that can thro[...]
The title of this post is the title of one of my recent books. (You can check it out if interested on amazon.) I mention it today because it's great shorthand for how to live differently. As a woman in recovery I talk to a lot of other women, and men too, in recovery who struggle, as I have struggled, with wanting a different life, a different set of experiences, different friends perhaps. But if we keep doing the same old thing we will keep getting the same old results. Wherever we go there we are, as author and speaker Earnie Larson was famous for sayin[...]
Circle of Family and Friends - You and Your Personal Community, Reflections in the Mirror - You and Yourself
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To embrace detachment offers us freedom from bondage. . .
I ponder the idea of detachment quite often. It's been the topic in more than one of the books I have written, (see www.womens-spirituality.com, books section) and it is the primary topic in many of the workshops and lectures I do in the public arena. I love the topic because it speaks to so many of us. And even though my life is no longer consumed by my attachments to others, the past can become the present all too easily. A "slip of the mind" can trigger the old behavior and I don't want to go there. I don't think I had ever heard the word "detachment[...]
Living in the now shouldn't be so hard. Should it? Most of us no doubt think that's where we reside. However, I'd venture to say we spend more time dwelling on the past or anticipating the future than we spend just soaking up this moment. Unconsciously our minds slip into those other realms. They so easily seduce us, especially if we have lived through trauma of some kind or have fear as our basic mind set. Fortunately it is possible to change one's mind set. I didn't always believe that but being in recovery rooms and committing to a spiritual path ha[...]